Ep. 58/ Two things you need to keep in mind when you meet someone new
By keeping your options open, holding boundaries, and embracing your feminine energy, you set the stage for a successful and fulfilling dating journey.
“Love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well.” – Vincent van Gogh
When we meet someone new, especially when we've been single for a while, it's easy to get swept away by intense emotions. We may think, "This is it! This is the one!" However, it's crucial to shift our mindset away from expecting fireworks at the beginning. Fireworks are beautiful but short-lived.
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1. Embrace the Slow Burn
Instead, think of building a relationship like tending to a steady oak fire in a fireplace. Oak firewood may take a little longer to ignite, but once it's burning, it provides deep and lasting warmth. Approach your new relationship with the intention of nurturing a slow, meaningful connection that has the potential to grow into something substantial.
2. Keep Your Options Open
It's natural to feel excited and invested when you meet someone you genuinely connect with. However, early on, it's essential to resist the urge to commit too quickly. Keep your options open without necessarily dating multiple people simultaneously. This means maintaining a mindset that acknowledges other potential matches.
By doing so, you create a healthy balance in your emotional investment. It prevents you from becoming overly anxious or fixated on one person, especially before you truly know who they are. Remember, early attraction doesn't always translate into a compatible long-term partner.
3. Hold Boundaries and Speak Your Truth
One of the most significant challenges in the early stages of a relationship is holding boundaries and communicating openly. It's easy to ignore red flags or make excuses for concerning behavior when you're afraid of losing a potential partner. However, compromising your boundaries sets an unhealthy precedent.
Commit to standing in your power and speaking your truth when necessary. If something doesn't align with your values or makes you uncomfortable, address it respectfully. A partner who values and respects you will appreciate your honesty and willingness to communicate openly. If they don't, it's an early sign that they might not be the right fit for you.
4. Enjoy Your Feminine Energy
During the initial phases of a relationship, embrace your feminine energy. This means allowing the man to invest effort and pursue you. Avoid immediately taking on the role of a girlfriend before he has earned it. Men appreciate the challenge and the opportunity to work for something they value.
When you let a man prove himself through his actions, you create a foundation for a healthy dynamic in the relationship. Remember that men value what they have to work for, and allowing him to invest in you from the beginning sets a positive tone for the future.
Conclusion
Venturing back into the dating world can be both exciting and nerve-wracking, especially after a challenging past relationship. It's essential to approach new connections with a mindset focused on building a lasting, healthy, and meaningful relationship rather than seeking immediate fireworks.
My client's story is a testament to the power of self-awareness, personal growth, and the willingness to step into your power in the realm of relationships. Dating after a difficult past is an act of bravery, and it's an opportunity to discover what you truly desire in a partner. So, go forward with courage, knowing that the right person will cherish your authenticity and respect your boundaries.
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**This post is based on personal experiences and observations and should not substitute professional counseling or therapy. If you're facing significant emotional distress, consider seeking guidance from a licensed mental health professional.